Wednesday, May 28, 2014
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
I've to struggle with the subject matter throughout this year. It is the hardest phase of my life at the moment. Literature is certainly not an easy course as it knocks me really hard this time. I absolutely will not give up but you certainly do not want to see how bad my condition right now. Please pray for me, to achieve another success in my life. Thank you.
confession of ~ iEyLa mYa ~ at 2:19 AM
Wednesday, March 12, 2014
As I grow older,
I start to realize
that I seldom smile in everyday life.
I used to laugh even at stupid jokes
I used to have fun with my best friends
I even used to smile at strangers I met.
Now I feel annoyed with trolls and jokes
Now I seldom meet up with friends
Now I become the little dwarf called grumpy.
this is not right
I do not want to invite wrinkles on my face at this age
Guess I have to smile more nowadays.
instead of using the smile emoticon.
Do smile in your everyday life people while you still have your teeth.hahahaha.
confession of ~ iEyLa mYa ~ at 2:49 PM
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Tonight, we met swiftly at a restaurant. He was wearing a red shirt and blue jeans, sitting in front of me with puffy smokes coming from his mouth and nose. Despite the shadows, noises and heat, he caught my eyes instantly. We still make fun of each other and laugh wholeheartedly like old times. I could feel the familiarity lingering in the air between us. The subtle smile he had when he saw me, the ramblings about dreams and future. Everything about him is magical.
3 months ago, I felt that his happiness like a betrayal.
3 months ago, when the lights turned green, he took a right turn. I drove straight.
Tonight, he still take a right turn but there is me beside him. There I realized life is a joke. When you meet your love, even though he looks close, he is far if you go. But meeting him like that, I feel as if I'm kidding myself into believing that he is close. Despite all that, he is still the relief to my misery. That much is enough. I've woken up from my dream. From now on I'm going to be your silent shadow. I finally made up my mind. Tough but not the toughest. I need to do that, to live.
confession of ~ iEyLa mYa ~ at 1:48 AM
Friday, November 29, 2013
There is one moment in life when I am doing something and I feel like the world has stopped and my life seems so miserable. Does it break my heart? Of course, every moment of every day, into more pieces than my heart was made of. I never thought of myself as quiet, much less silent, I never thought about things at all. Everything changed, the distance that wedged itself between me and my happiness wasn’t the world, it wasn’t the thesis or heavy workloads, it was me, my thinking, the cancer of never letting go. Is ignorance bliss? I don’t know, but it’s so painful to think. And tell me, what did thinking ever do for me, to what great place did thinking ever bring me? I think and think and think, I’ve thought myself out of happiness one million times, but never once into it.
Then, one important event has led me into a thought. Things do sure fall apart but i'm sure they will definitely fall into right place. I finally grasped that unexpected things were always going to happen in life. And with that I realized the only control I had was how I chose to handle them. So, I made the decision to survive using courage, humor, and grace. It's never too late, now I'm on my way to seek for my happiness and I hope you are working on yours too :)
confession of ~ iEyLa mYa ~ at 9:51 AM
Friday, November 8, 2013
November is driving me crazy, baby. It's driving me CRAZY!!!
Thesis. Wedding invitations. Work. How to be a good sister and daughter. Everything that I'm chasing seem to leave me empty and no matter how great things may seem, they always change.
Don't worry, baby. Life goes on, it sucks sometimes, but new great things always come around. I believe that things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out. And I promise life will never bring yourself or even myself down.
confession of ~ iEyLa mYa ~ at 12:04 AM
Thursday, September 26, 2013
I've always enjoyed traveling and having experience with different cultures and different people. Certainly, travel is more than seeing of sights, it is a change that goes on, deep, and permanent in the ideas of living. And I beg young people to travel. have your mind blown, eat delicious food, meet some interesting people, dig some interesting place, have an adventure, be careful. come back and you're going to see your country and yourself differently. So, please once a year go to a place where you've never been before.
What's holding you back from traveling? Is it fear? Get over it. You'll never feel more free and less afraid as when you realize you're no longer confined to your comfort zone. Be scared of routine, cockroaches, spiders, whatever. just don't fear travel. Is it money? Stop making excuses and go find a piggy bank and put in your travel fund.
For me, I travel with those people in the picture. One with a good sense of posing in a picture and another with a good sense of camera's angle. Why I choose them? One advice: Never go on trips with anyone you do not love. Hence, you can make a connection now I guess. I do love them to bits :)
So, let's plan for a roadtrip.
confession of ~ iEyLa mYa ~ at 2:39 PM